As a romance novelist I am, of course, an ardent romantic and the best part of my job is dreaming up romantic scenarios and infusing scenes with romantic details. The word ‘romance’, to me, conjures up images of sunsets and candlelight; wonderous scenery and calm, mellow moods; intimate meals and long, searching looks; electric shivers after a brush of skin on skin; words like ‘heart’ and ‘beautiful’ and ‘forever’.

But what of the romance of yesteryear? How did lovers show their feelings in times gone by? Here are some religious customs that were once de rigueur for courting couples:

• Until the emergence of medieval chivalry – Sir Lancelot galloping on his steed to rescue a fair damsel – love was not a fundamental part of marriage; most marriages were arranged. But the rescuing part was a pretty good indication that a man liked a woman!
• Seranades and poetry were early forms of wooing. Think of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet and Romeo’s climb to the balcony.
• In Norway, when a girl came of age she wore an empty sheath on her belt. A man would show his commitment to her by placing his knife in her sheath.
• If you were courting in 16th or 17th century America, you may have partaken in ‘bundling’ with your prospective partner. You shared a bed, fully clothed, with a ‘bundling board’ between you.
• Welsh men historically gave intricately carved love spoons to show interest in women.
• English gents sent a pair of gloves to those they wished to marry. If the woman agreed, she showed this by wearing the gloves to church.

Perhaps more influential than customs, however, have been legends – those of great lovers in history whose stories we still enjoy today: Cleopatra and Mark Anthony, Napoleon and Josephine, Marie and Pierre Curie, Queen Victoria and Prince Albert, Robert and Elizabeth Browning, Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall. More lasting still are the impressions created by the most romantic love stories of our cultures: Romeo and Juliet, Elizabeth and Darcy, Jane Eyre and Rochester, Lancelot and Guinevere, Tristan and Isolde.

Is romance at its height now, do you think, or did lovers express themselves better in the past? The popularity of romantic historical fiction certainly indicates that many modern-day readers find customs and manners of the past attractive. Which would you prefer – a modern-day date, or an afternoon of old-fashioned courtship? Are there old customs you’d like to see come back? I would love to hear your thoughts.